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- Eniola calls Dani
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EniolaHe’s cheating!
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DaniHuh? Who’s cheating?
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EniolaAyo! My husband.
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DaniOh come on girl... where is all this coming from. This is silly.
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EniolaSilly... you think I’m being silly?
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EniolaHe always hides his phone from me.
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EniolaAnd 10 minutes ago... on his phone... I saw a call come in from “Edible Catering”.
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DaniOk... so his caterer called him?
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EniolaWhat stupid caterer!
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EniolaNo one runs out of the room and blushes when a caterer calls.
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DaniCome on Eniola. What if it’s an innocent call?
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EniolaInnocent my ass!
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EniolaIf you see how he smiled... He hasn’t even smiled at me that way in a long time.
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DaniOk... your birthday!
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DaniYour birthday is coming up, so what if he’s planning a surprise party?
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EniolaHmmm!
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EniolaThat can’t be possible. He said he was out on a business trip in 2 weeks.
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EniolaAnd you know what’s worse...
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EniolaI checked with Archibong from his office. Archibong doesn’t know of any trip that Ayo has planned.
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DaniAh! That’s the perfect cover for a surprise party.
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DaniA call from caterer... Ayo smiling and rushing out of the room... then him traveling the week of your birthday.
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EniolaHmmn!
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DaniBabe, I’m your best friend, so I’ll be honest with you.
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DaniI think you’re being a little paranoid.
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EniolaBetter paranoid than to catch STD from a cheating husband.
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EniolaOya, send me Kudirat’s number.
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DaniKudirat? Why?
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EniolaShebi she’s a “runs-girl”?
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EniolaSend me her number, I want to set a trap for Ayo.
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DaniWoah! Madam FBI. You’re joking right?
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EniolaAs long as I have my peace of mind, I can always act surprised if he’s truly planning a surprise party.
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DaniI don’t even know what to say.
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DaniOk, let me 3-way her.
- Dani initiates a 3-way phone call with Kudirat, the runs-girl.
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DaniKudirat, as I explained, my friend Eniola needs your help.
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EniolaHello Kudirat, it’s about my husband Ayo.
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EniolaI want you to...
- 2 days later
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EniolaDani, I’m in position... the eagle has landed on the runway.
- Eniola whispers into her phone.
- She’s wearing a black raincoat with oversized sunglasses, and sitting in a dark corner.
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DaniHahaha... which one is “eagle” and “runway”?
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DaniAbeg, speak correct english and stop acting like Madam Detective.
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EniolaFree me jare.
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EniolaI’m saying that Ayo just walked to the bar alone.
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DaniOya, let’s set the peacock on him to spread her feathers.
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DaniAnd maybe she will hit him with her love potion.
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EniolaStop joking jo.
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EniolaKudirat had better do her thing men! I’m in trouble if Ayo finds out he's being setup.
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DaniDon’t worry Kudirat is an expert in matters of the heart.
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DaniI’ve never seen one guy reject her. In fact if she and the Pope are in the same room...
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DaniLet’s just say he won’t be Pope for much longer.
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EniolaFor reals! Abeg tell her to take it sofry sofry o!
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EniolaBecause if he’s not cheating, I don’t want him to suddenly develop strange ideas.
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DaniBuhahaha... shebi you want to investigate, now fear dey catch you.
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DaniYou just keep watching.
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EniolaRemind Kudirat to call me with her bluetooth headset so I can hear their discussion.
- 15 minutes later
- Kudirat enters the bar and immediately all eyes turn to face her.
- She slowly makes her way to the dance floor and begins to dance in a very appealing way.
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EniolaWow! This Kudirat! She’s Jezebel herself personified.
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DaniDon’t blame me if you man no fit hold body o! This was all your idea.
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EniolaHonestly, I’m not sure, maybe we should just cancel this plan.
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DaniFear dey catch you say Kudirat go steal your man.
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DaniOk o, I will call her phone to stop.
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EniolaAh! Hurry, she’s already walking towards Ayo.
- Kudirat makes contact with Ayo before Dani can tell her that the plan has been called off.
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KudiratExcuse me, is this seat taken?
- Ayo is staring at Kudirat like he’s seen the face of an angel... a seductively beautiful angel.
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KudiratHello... can you hear me?
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AyoOh... eh... Hi.
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AyoNo the seat is available. Go ahead, it’s yours.
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AyoLet me pull it out for you
- Kudirat giggles softly, her voice sounds like wedding bells rings.
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KudiratThank you sir, you’re such a gentleman.
- Meanwhile Eniola is miserable in the corner of the bar.
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EniolaGod! What have I done to myself?
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EniolaDani, quickly do a 3-way call with Kudirat. I want to hear the conversation.
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EniolaAnd remind her that I’m watching so she shouldn’t try nonsense.
- Dani starts dialing Kudirat’s phone.
- Back to Kudirat and Ayo.
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KudiratHaha Mr. Ayo, you’re so hilarious.
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KudiratSo Mr. Ayo, what’s a handsome and funny man doing all alone at the bar?
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AyoFirst of all, don’t call me Mr. Ayo, just Ayo.
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AyoAnd I’m just here to unwind after a long day at work before...
- *** Ring Ring ***
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KudiratAh... Excuse me, I need to pick up this call, that’s my boyfriend.
- Kudirat picks up Dani’s call and pretends that it is a call from her imaginary boyfriend, James.
- Gradually she begins to feign anger and despair.
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KudiratJames, what do you mean it’s over?
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KudiratI’ve given you 2 years of my life and you just end it over the phone!
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KudiratWhat did I ever do wrong?
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KudiratJames, don’t you hang up... James, James!
- Kudirat bursts into tears as she puts her phone down.
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AyoI hope I’m not intruding, but are you ok?
- Kudirat turns to face Ayo with tears in her eyes.
- She immediately grabs onto his neck and continues to sob.
- The smell of her perfume hits Ayo’s nostrils.
- Ayo can feel her soft, warm cleavage and his body stiffens.
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KudiratHe left me. James left me for no reason.
- She pulls back and looks deeply into Ayo’s eyes, sucking him into her gaze.
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KudiratAm I not beautiful enough? Did I not try enough?
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KudiratI helped him pay off his debt, cooked for him, loved him despite his flaws.
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AyoI’m so sorry to hear.
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AyoNot all men recognize a good thing when they see it.
- Meanwhile, back to Eniola... who is watching all this drama play out.
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EniolaMy God!
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EniolaThis girl is the devil herself.
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DaniYup! The damsel in distress story always works to catch men.
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EniolaAbeg, Kudirat that’s enough. Leave my husband alone.
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EniolaStop clinging onto his body. I know you can hear me over the bluetooth headset.
- Back to Kudirat and Ayo.
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KudiratIt hurts so bad...
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AyoKudirat, maybe you should leave the bar, and get some fresh air.
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AyoSeeing other couples here will only continue to make you feel sad.
- With fake tears in her eyes.
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KudiratI can’t be alone by myself.
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KudiratPlease stay with me for a few hours, don’t let me suffer through this alone.
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AyoKudirat, I’m so sorry. I wish I could.
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AyoBut you probably need a close friend.
- More tears begin to flow.
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KudiratPlease, Mr Ayo, don’t let me be alone.
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KudiratJust stay with me until a friend comes over.
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AyoTo be honest Kudirat, I don’t exactly trust myself around you.
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AyoYou’re in a really vulnerable state, and I don’t think good things will happen if you’re alone with a man.
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AyoMoreover, I am married. I love my wife to death, and would hate to do something that betrays her trust.
- At this point Eniola who is listening via Kudirat’s earpiece begins to float on clouds.
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EniolaHe loves me! Dani, did you hear him... Ayo rejected someone as beautiful as Kudirat.
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DaniSee girl, I told you that you were being paranoid.
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DaniYou’ve got yourself a good man.
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EniolaYeah.
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EniolaAh Kudirat...
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EniolaThat’s enough, leave my man alone before I break beer bottle on your head.
- 2 days later
- Dani is lying down on her bed in black lace lingerie.
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DaniWow! That acting was something else.
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DaniFor one second, I almost believed it was real.
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DaniThat no woman could ever seduce you.
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AyoHehe... that Kudirat girl is something else.
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AyoIf you hadn’t warned me of Eniola’s trap in advance, only God knows what would have happened.
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AyoMaybe it’s you that would have been trying to set a trap to catch me this time?
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DaniYou better watch yourself Mr. Man.
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DaniOtherwise, you will not get “some” tonight.
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AyoHaba! Dani, don’t do me like that.
- Ayo takes off his jeans and lies down on top of Dani.
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DaniBut I can’t believe you saved my number as “Edible Catering”.
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DaniYou better change it once your wife’s birthday is over.
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DaniAnd make it something cute like “Sweet Sensations’, or “Tantalizers”.
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AyoHaha.
- Ayo grabs Dani’s breasts with his hands, but his eyes are gazing far into space...
- ...thinking of Kudirat.
- The End
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